I transitioned from female to male at age 16 — and I regretted it

On Wednesday, the Supreme Court began hearing oral arguments in the case of US v. Skrmetti. It pertains to a 2023 Tennessee law that bans health care professionals from administering gender-affirming care, such as puberty blockers and hormone therapy, to minors. Max Lazzara, a 28-year-old Seattle woman who medically transitioned to male at age 16 — and then detransitioned years later — submitted a brief in support of the ban being upheld.

“We have a duty to children to make sure they’re taken care,” Lazzara told The Post. She defines herself as “staunchly left-wing” and has no qualms with medical care for trans adults. But minors are different.

Here, she shares her story.

Lazzara was a rowdy, tomboyish little girl. Courtesy of Max Lazzara

Growing up as a girl named Mary in a Catholic family in Minneapolis, I was just a little bit tomboyish, a little bit rowdy. There was a short period when I was around 5 when I insisted I was a boy.

It wasn’t really until puberty that I really started feel strongly that I should be the opposite sex. A lot of it had to do with my sexual orientation. I was attracted to girls and in denial about it.

I also didn’t learn much about my body. I started puberty around 11 and had debilitating periods that would last for weeks. Having a female body felt scary, so I needed to change my body.

I struggled with mental health and made “superficial” suicide attempts, with over-the-counter painkillers, at ages 11, 13 and 14.

At 14, I stumbled on a Tumblr about female-to-male transgender people — basically saying, you’re born biologically female and you decide that you want to live as male.

Lazzara started puberty early and found having a female body scary. Courtesy of Max Lazzara

I was like, OK, I’m trans. That’s why everything feels wrong. That’s why I’ve been depressed. That’s why my family life didn’t work out well.

I came out to my friends and my mother, changed my name to Max and started living as a boy.

At age 16, Lazzara began taking testosterone and got a double mastectomy. Courtesy of Max Lazzara

When I was 15, I was sexually assaulted and made a more serious suicide attempt using prescription medications. I was hospitalized in the psychiatric ward and referred to the University of Minnesota for gender therapy.

I had two intake appointments, and basically I told them what they wanted to hear. I wasn’t lying or anything, but the criteria was, like, “Did you like to play with boys when you were a kid” and “Do you ever want to wear pants?”

They diagnosed me with gender identity disorder, which is now called gender dysphoria.

My mom was terrified after my suicide attempts. She just wanted to do anything to keep me from hurting myself. Five months after my initial intake, I was on testosterone gel.

Just before my 17th birthday, I had a double mastectomy.

Lazzara’s mental health struggles persisted after transitioning. Courtesy of Max Lazzara

But I was still struggling — I’d also been diagnosed with bipolar disorder and OCD — and made another attempt on my life. 

It wasn’t all bad. I had my first girlfriend, went to junior prom and graduated high school. But I also continued to struggle. I abused alcohol and pharmaceuticals and made another suicide at age 20 and was hospitalized. At age 21, I spent seven months at a residential mental health facility. There, I developed a severe eating disorder.

In the spring of 2020, I started reading online about women who had detransitioned. One day, I looked in a mirror and it hit me like a ton of bricks: I am a woman.

Four years ago, at 24, I stopped taking testosterone and started living as a woman.

It was a huge relief — it just felt like I could exhale. These days, I’m doing pretty well. I identify as a lesbian and live with my longtime girlfriend.

Lazzara (pictured last month), is now happily living as a woman and identifies as a lesbian. Courtesy of Max Lazzara

My main motivation for writing a brief for the case was because I feel like my mother’s fear from my suicide attempts was used to convince her that medical intervention was necessary.

There are plenty of things that people under 18 cannot legally consent to. And I think gender-affirming care should fall under that.

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